Doc Vader (a.k.a. ZDoggMD) takes a tour of the doctors’ lounge and finds the force is not strong with the vending machine selections.
You want happy hospital folks? Feed them. Or watch it get dark-side real quick …
Read the transcript:
My life, all that training in this sad, pathetic break room. There’s a bright spot to the center of the universe. This is the place it’s farthest from.
You want a tour? Please do not eat or throw away anything that you did not put in the refrigerator. Oh, it says “Sue’s” on it. That sounds like it’ll be delicious.
Are you kidding me? Susan, keep your Reuben fresh. If I’m going take it out of the fridge and eat it, I want it to be actually edible.
This is our doctors’ lounge, okay? The hospital will throw this at us and be like, “There you go, doctors. We really appreciate you.” So what do they give us? They give us an ATM machine in our own doctors’ lounge between two vending machines that spew diabetogenic garbage. This is an insult. We do all the work in this place. They could give us this ish for free.
Then, they make the nurses do potlucks. Feed us, all right? You want us to be happy? You want us to take care of patients? You want us to click all those quality measures? Then, feed us some real food.
Also, I have no money in any legal bank account. I’ve shifted entirely to Bitcoin because the taxes, though. The taxes.
Did you ever notice that Mountain Dew is the official drink of morons? You never see a smart person just casually sipping a Mountain Dew. Like you don’t see the neurosurgeon, like, “Hello.” No, it’s always like the orthopod. [MAKES NOISE]
Do you know there are times in a doctor’s life where you just have trouble holding it together? This is what it’s become. I put the money in, but my Orange Crush is not being excreted.
I was the top of my class at the academy and I am literally considering microwaving this, and eating it. Why?
I’m going to burn this place down. They keep pushing us. Eventually, we’re going to push back.
Veda’s stuck. I had my tantrum and now I’m done, but I’m frightened. Hello! I’m pushing the call button, but nobody’s coming. Betty! Help!
This post originally appeared on ZDoggMD.